” I was not proud of my mother and father. I was embarrassed by their lack of education.”
From ‘The achievement of desire’
I think he was just young and confused. He was raised with hardworking, barely educated Spanish parents and when he was introduced to school and the way to escape into education. He didn’t know how to balance the two. I think knew his parents were proud of him, he was trying to find himself, and he didn’t know how to become a little bit of both worlds, without turning his back on either one.
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It's hard to live in two worlds
You are right. We should understand the situation of the writer who was living in a Spanish immigrant family whose parents could hardly speak standard English and his family remained Spanish culture, and, at the same time, he was working hard to enter the mainstream culture of America through schooling. This disparity was confusing enough to a second grader. When he had to choose a lifegoal for him to study for, he could only choose American education, and give up Spanish family.
It must have been very miserable throughout his life, but what mattered more to the achievement of his life forced him to make the decision he made.
As we all said, when you choose something, you have to give up others. What you give up will remain as regrets all your life.
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